Detecting

Yes, thank you for asking. Fighting fit now. Well, as fighting fit as I ever get. I can now walk up the hill to work without getting slightly panicky because I can’t breathe. We have a GP’s surgery at the top of said hill. I kept thinking that, if all else failed I could fall dramatically through their front door and they would revive me with exciting potions and new technologies. I have since been informed that, judging by their recent performance, it was more likely that they would look down at my prostrate form and say “Could you come back three weeks on Tuesday?”

Nice weekend had by all. On Saturday we had one of those nice things with chums where you sit down for breakfast coffee and before you know it, you are saying – “Does anyone fancy lunch”? We went to church on Sunday. Can I say something that is probably wrong? Sometimes I find church in the holidays a bit er….low key? Not that the staff etc shouldn’t take holidays. Indeed they should. I just sometimes wonder if any of us should be there. Half the congregation are missing. A lot of work had gone into a preach but I really couldn’t tell you what it was about, and I am a GOOD listener. I just wonder if we couldn’t do something a bit more creative with these summer gatherings. Like stay at home?

Sunday evening we watched something called Fake or Fortune which I have never seen before. I don’t think that I shall be bothering it again. It’s about art and paintings and the like. TV’s Fiona Bruce and a posh bloke are shown a painting, the provenance of which is uncertain. (Please note that TV’s Fiona Bruce says “Provenance” in a special way. To re-create the effect try saying it without moving your lips and with a slight French accent) We then watch as the evidence is collected to try and establish that the painting is genuine. (To my untutored eye, it seemed that they found enough evidence to convict Tiny Tim to be honest – what with the signature and handwriting being genuine, and the paints being the same as the paints found in the artist’s box and that was all before a Canadian expert – and we all trust Canadians – said that he felt that it was an original) So you could have knocked me down with a feather, when the expert who had first crossed this painting off her “genuine paintings list” wrote to them and said that she didn’t think that it was any good. Apparently, she just didn’t like the look of it. Art is brutal.

Aged Parent continues to make good progress and her cast is due off next week. She is concerned that her arm may have “gone rotten” underneath and is unimpressed by my assurance that this has never happened to any plastered limb – anywhere – anytime – ever. She was expecting the police to have contacted her by now to sort out the trial that she expected as she had decided that  (a) insurance fraud and (b) drink and drugs  were instrumental in her accident. I have gently reminded her that the paramedic felt that she had had a tiny nudge by a car from a standing start and also that there is absolutely no evidence of fraud and illicit substances. Also – perhaps a little less True Movies might make her less likely to see this stuff everywhere. I felt she was disappointed but content. I was wrong.

Aged Parent.       I have been watching. “Stop Police!” And it has done me good.

Me                          Oh yes?

Aged Parent        I have watched them arresting drug dealers and murderers.

Me (warily)         And how has it done you good?

Aged Parent        Well, at least there are some good police left after the way they let me down. I was talking to Iris – you know – her with the Crohn’s and the front teeth missing – and she told me that the police should have been running my case for me. 

Me                          What case!!? There is no “case”!

Aged Parent         Exactly. No case at all and whose fault is that?

Sometimes I am very tired. Have a great week.

 

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4 Comments

    • lesleyps91
      Author
      August 14, 2018 / 8:34 pm

      Why thank you

  1. August 14, 2018 / 9:32 am

    I agree with Barbara. Sometimes life is just overwhelming and, coupled with the recent heat, I’m amazed anything was achieved in July. I enjoy most of Fiona Bruce’s stuff (except Hiveminds which seemed a poor relation of Only Connect) but missed this latest one. Re Church In August – always difficult. Our place cancels the evening service. The pastor is away 2 out of 4 Sundays, so visiting preachers endeavour to encourage the depleted worshippers. And the pastor preached at the village Chapel on his first holiday Sunday. Next week he will be listening to his wife preaching there. Busman’s Holiday! I do hope Aged Parent finds closure soon (as my USA friends say) regarding her rta. It must be wearing for you. X

    • lesleyps91
      Author
      August 14, 2018 / 8:34 pm

      I think it’s very refreshing to cancel the evening service.

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