We are all over the place at the moment. Two people going to University in the next three days. Fortunately HOH has had some time off work so the main burden of overseeing and generally chivvying everyone up has fallen on him – he is playing to his strengths here.
I am a bit jumpy about them both going – not because I don’t want them to go. They are ready and this is the right thing. FOW1 is going back to do his Masters and FOW2 is returning to education after a year out and she has really missed it. I just wonder how I will be. Also – sometimes I think I will be fine with it and then I feel a bit guilty.
I was talking to someone after church on Sunday though and she was brilliant. She told me – quite firmly – and I paraphrase a bit. “I was fine when they left home. I thought it was fantastic. Lovely and quiet and ordered. No more piles of washing or buying food for England. Coming and going as you please. People talk about it being a bereavement and it’s not a bereavement. It’s not as if someone has died or gone away to war. They have gone somewhere that they really want to go. They are blessed to do so and I thank God for it. (And they are back more often than I would like as well)”
I think this is right. I will miss them – I am not sure I will ever get used to watching Only Connect on my own but I am grateful to be here to see them spreading their wings and this is good for them. Once again I discover that it’s not all about me.