This week

This week I will be mostly

  • Rooting round the bottom of wardrobes to find presents that I cunningly bought ahead and have now lost.
  • Trying to keep patient with old ladies who cannot believe that we don’t run a bus to visit the pub on Christmas morning
  • Washing the back of my eyes out to try and rid myself of the picture of Sir Alec Ferguson coming down a long staircase at the BBC Sports Personality of the Year Awards, while Russell Watson sings “To Dream The Impossible Dream.” *Rubs eyes hard* Nope – can still see it.
  • Wondering if it is ever acceptable to not wrap presents. Surely more environmentally friendly?
  • Getting snotty when Mums on Facebook who have a month of exciting Advent activities for their children are making me weep with inferiority. 
  • Trying not to get to upset over Syrian children in that horrific winter and also that video on You Tube of the abandoned puppy running after the car that it had just been chucked out of. As you can see, my priorities are expertly balanced.
  • Re above – what is the matter with everybody?
  • Re above and the above that – Am having unsavoury fantasies re puppy abandoners, Syrian generals on both sides and big stick with a nail in it. Am aware that this is probably NOT what Jesus would do. Probably.
  • Re above and above etc etc. Think I am very tired

Am working on personal  theory that God invented Christmas to save the world and then decided to put it in winter to try and cheer me up a bit. You may feel that this is a little ME-centric and you could be right I suppose. It is working for me at the moment though. As is kids assuring me that twenty and seventeen is too old to be making snowflake cut outs and they would rather watch Die Hard and run informal yet somehow quite aggressive competition to force as many Ferero Rochers into their mouths as possible. Not much like The Waltons. Funnier though.

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6 Comments

  1. December 16, 2013 / 11:32 pm

    Re Wrapping presents; last weekend I collected daughter &bloke from station – and on the way picked up a book in a charity shop for my beloved. We had our Xmas meal in the evening then swapped presents. Realised I hadn't wrapped the book. Grabbed a metallic golden jiffy bag, shoved it in, folded it over [hiding the label addressed to me] and gave it to him. He opened it, thanked me and put it back in the bag.
    THEN I realised Mark had not had HIS gift. It was still in the plastic carrier under the cupboard. Grabbed bag, and Bobs jiffy bag. Dashed out into the hall. Put book in carrier and gave it to Bob and presented Mark with his gift in the gold jiffy bag,.How many times can I re-use this same golden jiffy bag for gifts this year? Feeling very environmentally friendly.
    I am overtired and my house is an unbelievable tip.

    • December 17, 2013 / 9:11 am

      The state of my house is proabably a case for environmental health

  2. December 17, 2013 / 2:39 pm

    If only we could gift with out wrapping, think how great it would be.

    As for the state of houses, well mine is awful… Thats what happens when you have a new central heating system so close to Christmas.

    X x

  3. December 18, 2013 / 8:45 am

    Always best to get heating sorted though. Our boiler died on Christmas Eve once – traumatic!

  4. December 23, 2013 / 9:15 pm

    Am totes with you on the big stick with nail. Probably ought to go and repent about that.

  5. December 23, 2013 / 10:35 pm

    Not necessarily : ) Lovely to hear from you

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