Hard Reality

I wanted to share a strange thing with you. It is that I have been very impressed by the honesty of someone’s grief. When I say impressed, I obviously mean that I understand that, given a choice, this person would rather not go through it at all  but still, his behaviour has done him credit. Rick Warren is the author of The Purpose Driven Life, the best selling Christian book. He is a pastor, a teacher, a giver and an all round good egg. At the beginning of April, his son Matthew took his own life. Matthew, a Christian, had suffered with bi-polar disorder for most of his life. Pastor Warren is a prolific tweeter. Like most Christian leaders, his tweets are usually positive and upbeat. They changed significantly after Matthew’s death. You my think that this would be obvious. However, there is sometimes a school of Christian thought that faith translates into “positivity in all circumstances.” When I was ill, I remember someone literally yelling “All things work together for good for those that love God” under the toilet door at me, when I had fled there to escape. She was only trying to help. She didn’t. I sometimes think I sense Christians being encouraged to sort of ignore the grief by repeating how great God is – if only through gritted teeth. Warren has not done this. His Tweets are shot through with grief, yet he finds comfort in Jesus.

Every time my heart shatters I take the pieces to Jesus for repair.

We can’t grow without change. We can’t change without letting go. We can’t let go without some loss, and that brings grief.

Grief comes in waves.When a big wave hits, you cant ignore it.You surf it and ride it out. My surfboard is talking to Jesus.

Kay and I are overwhelmed by your love, prayers, and kind words. You are all encouraging our #brokenhearts.

Many people have been really helped by The Warrens’ honesty. God has depth. He has the deepest depth. When we try and pretend that bad things don’t happen or that when they happen we don’t really get hurt, then I think that we make God seem shallow. When people grieve  God enters into that grief with them. He doesn’t leave them alone and he asks that we do the same.

Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep.



  1. May 29, 2013 / 4:05 pm

    I agree with your "take" on Rick Warren's (at least public) honesty re. his grief…..

  2. May 29, 2013 / 8:07 pm

    Indeed Rebecca. We are probably only skimming the surface of the grief they are feeling and who knows what goes on privately. He always strikes me as an upfront kind of person though.

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